Hello,
My name is James D. Gray.
In this entry from my book I'll be attempting to open your ears. One of the biggest aspects of life that people forget about, is other people. These other people have things to say and you have things to say to them as well but it's not always easy to say these things. Sometimes people will do things without telling you why. Sometimes they don't really know why right from the start. It may take some time to understand others or for others to understand you. All of this could be made better by knowing how to communicate with each other.
Communication isn't always about talking. You don't have to turn everything into an interview, you can convey part of your message through actions. A lot of people think that they are able to be understood only by the actions they preform. This is hardly ever the case when actions are not followed by questions or explanations. Most of the time, actions are followed by confusion and hate. If someone doesn't understand the things you've done then you should reflect on what it was. Find out why you did it and then try to tell the other person what you think the reason was. The other person may be you. If you see someone doing something for or directed at you, then you should try and understand why they did it and not get immediately upset at them. Be kind and patient with them because they may have a hard time vocalizing their feelings. Even the simplest of things we do can have the biggest importance.
This is not to say that verbal communication is not important. Most of us need to hear some talk. In my experience, when someone is not feeling that all is well, they will bottle up their feelings and shut their mouths. They expect everyone to know how they feel and why but every second of life has innumerable variables, the only one that knows what you're thinking is you. People can guess, they can share experiences with you, they can even start to see a pattern in your behavior that can lead them to the correct answer. However, if you don't share, then they can never know for sure. You can assume that they don't know and assume that you don't know. Never let it lead to a pattern of distrust, just an open line of communication.
Don't take my words too directly. There is a wrong way to tell people what you're thinking or how your feeling. Talking to someone isn't a battle and there are no rights or wrongs. Everyone has their own view and everyone is allowed to feel however they want. You shouldn't be trying to tell someone else what they're doing or feeling, only talk about yourself. Tell them what you see and how it affects you. Express your personal idea. When they ask for your advise don't tell them what you think they should do but what you would choose to do in their situation. This is communication and not control or demands. This is a thought, lost on our society today, so remember that if someone doesn't practice this, don't be upset with them. It may take some doing, to see this undoing through. Be patient and kind.
Lastly I would like to share with you one of my favorite quotes.
"Believe nothing you hear, and only one half that you see." -Edger Allen Poe
Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear, as I remember it best. Even in the face of something that seems like the whole story, the truth is, that you don't know. You may see something but that doesn't mean that you know what you saw. You may hear something but that doesn't mean that you know if it's true. Please don't lie to each other, keep your mind and body clean, and talk to one another when you feel the world around you doesn't feel right.
Thank you for your time. I'm still working on writing more about this in my book.
My name is James D. Gray.
In this entry from my book I'll be attempting to open your ears. One of the biggest aspects of life that people forget about, is other people. These other people have things to say and you have things to say to them as well but it's not always easy to say these things. Sometimes people will do things without telling you why. Sometimes they don't really know why right from the start. It may take some time to understand others or for others to understand you. All of this could be made better by knowing how to communicate with each other.
Communication isn't always about talking. You don't have to turn everything into an interview, you can convey part of your message through actions. A lot of people think that they are able to be understood only by the actions they preform. This is hardly ever the case when actions are not followed by questions or explanations. Most of the time, actions are followed by confusion and hate. If someone doesn't understand the things you've done then you should reflect on what it was. Find out why you did it and then try to tell the other person what you think the reason was. The other person may be you. If you see someone doing something for or directed at you, then you should try and understand why they did it and not get immediately upset at them. Be kind and patient with them because they may have a hard time vocalizing their feelings. Even the simplest of things we do can have the biggest importance.
This is not to say that verbal communication is not important. Most of us need to hear some talk. In my experience, when someone is not feeling that all is well, they will bottle up their feelings and shut their mouths. They expect everyone to know how they feel and why but every second of life has innumerable variables, the only one that knows what you're thinking is you. People can guess, they can share experiences with you, they can even start to see a pattern in your behavior that can lead them to the correct answer. However, if you don't share, then they can never know for sure. You can assume that they don't know and assume that you don't know. Never let it lead to a pattern of distrust, just an open line of communication.
Don't take my words too directly. There is a wrong way to tell people what you're thinking or how your feeling. Talking to someone isn't a battle and there are no rights or wrongs. Everyone has their own view and everyone is allowed to feel however they want. You shouldn't be trying to tell someone else what they're doing or feeling, only talk about yourself. Tell them what you see and how it affects you. Express your personal idea. When they ask for your advise don't tell them what you think they should do but what you would choose to do in their situation. This is communication and not control or demands. This is a thought, lost on our society today, so remember that if someone doesn't practice this, don't be upset with them. It may take some doing, to see this undoing through. Be patient and kind.
Lastly I would like to share with you one of my favorite quotes.
"Believe nothing you hear, and only one half that you see." -Edger Allen Poe
Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear, as I remember it best. Even in the face of something that seems like the whole story, the truth is, that you don't know. You may see something but that doesn't mean that you know what you saw. You may hear something but that doesn't mean that you know if it's true. Please don't lie to each other, keep your mind and body clean, and talk to one another when you feel the world around you doesn't feel right.
Thank you for your time. I'm still working on writing more about this in my book.
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